Runaway Bride

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‘The Child takes the plunge at the Grand Canyon’

I am seldom at a loss for words, but this week I find myself almost too stunned to start this story. I’ll cheat and share what friends had to say: “Wow. So exciting!” “Simply beautiful, Alice! Congratulations to you and the happy couple!” “Beautiful couple and setting!” “OMG how stunningly beautiful!”

“Stunningly beautiful:” Scenery AND bride

Yes. The Child and The Beau got married. Eloped, actually. Saturday, May 1. At sunset. At the Grand Canyon. I’m still pinching myself.

Just the two of them. Plus that Lucky Preacher Guy. Oh, and a hub-and-wife photography team — who also served as witnesses

You see, The Happy Couple got engaged last November (See “How on Earth Did THIS Happen?” for deets) and had intended to get married in a ceremony complete with family and friends early next year, assuming the Covid Tide had turned. But they were advised to proceed with due haste so that the Bridegroom would not be deported. (James is Canadian, you see, from Saskatchewan, in fact, and his green card was getting stale.)

Being the kind of Crazy Kids that they are, they decided, if they were going to “have to get married” (which means something oh-so-different than it did back in my day), then they were going do it in style. Luckily, her Childness’s Great Friend From High School had visited a few weeks ago and lured her to a bridal shop in Scottsdale to try on dresses “just for fun.”

The Dress being tried on. (Not a scrap of makeup, hair in ponytail. Gorgeous all the same.) This photo was shared with me only after I was sworn to secrecy

So, even though the wedding was quite a way off (or so they thought) the Dress had been chosen. To keep the suspense — and her feet tulle-free on the pedals — The Child drove the rig in casual duds to the wedding venue and changed there. And what a wedding venue it was: the Rim of the Grand Canyon. You regular readers will remember that the Grand Canyon has played a big part in the Happy Couple’s life so far.

Taken after Rim 2 Rim 2 Rim One

They have run the Rim 2 Rim 2 Rim course not once — but twice. For the uninitiated, the Rim 2 Rim 2 Rim is when you run down the rim of the Grand Canyon, across the canyon floor, up the other rim, then down and across and back up to where you started. It pains me to even think about it, much less do it. (You can read more about this in “Deeds of Derring-Don’t”.)

This was taken after Rim 2 Rim 2 Rim Two. No, it was not the same weekend they got married. That would have been poor planning indeed

But enough with Rim 2 Rim 2 Rim. That was a big deal. But this is a Big Deal. Here’s more about what just might be called Wedding 1 of 2 — and to doing things in style.

The Hair on the way to the Truck

In honor of the occasion, The Child had her makeup, hair and nails done. (Trust me; she is not normally the “makeup, hair and nails done” type. See photo of her trying on her wedding dress in the bridal shop to see her normal state of groomed-ness.) But she said she had a whale of a good time getting buffed and polished.

And hey, you only get married once. Or, in her case, twice, since they are still going to proceed with their plans for a “real” wedding. Meaning a wedding that Other People get to attend. (I am really happy about this — and still jealous of that Preacher Guy.)

Another Good Friend sent her this canyon-y bridal bouquet

It was (to put it mildly) a surprise, but I do think they did the right thing by going ahead with Wedding 1. This way nobody gets kicked out of the country and, hey, she gets to wear that gorgeous dress again. In fact, I told her that I am referring to this first wedding not as Wedding 1 of 2, but as the “Dress Rehearsal.” You know, since she got to rehearse wearing The Dress.

A truck full of tulle: I am thrilled at the prospect of Wedding 2 of 2. For one thing, I want to see That Dress in person.

I’m having as much trouble ending this as I did starting it. So, back to a Friend Quote (Thank you, Jane): “How wonderful Alice!!!!!! And how romantic!!!! Congratulations to all!!”

Here’s to you, O Child and Beau — er, make that Newlyweds 1 and 2 (!)

New York City, May 2021

 

 

 

 

La Dolce Vita and Me

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‘The time I flew to Rome for a wedding in the Vatican’

The Dude is still kicking himself that he was ‘too busy’ to go. A friend of ours, who happened to be one of the Pope’s attorneys, invited us to his wedding. (This was way before Pope Francis, so he wasn’t one of his attorneys. But, come to think of it, I’m not sure Pope Francis needs attorneys.) Anyway, this friend was getting married to a woman from a Great Italian Family — and because of their well-connectedness, they were getting married in the Vatican.

We found out about it when we got this amazing wedding invitation in the mail. Calligraphy, of course. On parchment. Several sheets of parchment. In fact, this invitation was more like an illuminated medieval manuscript than anything else. There were pages and pages. The woman from the Great Italian Family needed a whole page just to list all her names.

There was a page for the ceremony, to be held in one of the chapels in the Actual Vatican Itself. (Not the Sistine, but close.) And pages listing all the other fun stuff planned for the wedding guests: A Ball in a Palace (“white tie or full military dress”), Rehearsal Dinner in a Private Club (“black tie”), Private Tour of the Sistine Chapel (“Appropriately Modest Attire”), Reception at the American Academy (“Whatever You Wore to the Wedding”, or something like that). Etc. Etc. Etc. Continue reading

Winning the Dude-A-Thon

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‘We make it to 31 on the 31st’

It snowed late that March too. A lot. So much that we were worried about travel. No, not for our guests, but for us.

See, we didn’t really have a wedding. We are officially married, rest assured. But those jillion-dollar affairs with champagne spigots and swans carved from ice? Not for us. For one thing, we were paying for it ourselves. And for another thing, while Dude Man does like attention, he does not like being the center of attention. Which can’t help but happen if you have a wedding. With yourself in it, I mean.

Speaking of being the center of attention, The Dude and I demonstrate the secret to a long marriage: racy underpants. Worn on your head, of course

Speaking of being the center of attention, The Dude and I demonstrate the secret to a long marriage: racy underpants. Worn on your head, of course. (Oh, I’ve got a story involving underpants and a huge dog you might like)

See, The Dude had been to one too many weddings where people did things like write ‘Help Me!’ on the soles of the bridegroom’s shoes so everyone tittered when the kneeling bits happened. And, speaking of shoes, he once forgot his when he packed for an out-of-town wedding–a wedding where he was the Best Man. Continue reading