Safari, so good.

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‘Our African Adventure gets off to a roaring start’

You can’t just wave a magic wand and wish yourself to Africa. Even if it is Someone’s Dream Trip, you still have to get there the old-fashioned way. Which is modern air travel.

Now some of you readers may fly first or business class, or even on private jets. In which case, I ask you most kindly to skip the comments section this week. Or I just may bring you back some unwashed fruit, and chuckle demonically while I watch you eat it.

Because, not to sound ungrateful for the amazing opportunity to go on a trip like this, let’s be honest and say that getting to Africa, by coach, New York to Amsterdam to Nairobi, all in one go, is definitely not half the fun.

I will skip the sordid details — the toddlers who, when not shrieking, played percussion with the tray tables, starving in the Amsterdam Airport and finding nothing to eat but cheese. (They sold cheese in every store, bless them. If a sign said ‘Electronics’ it sold electronics. And cheese.) And I will most definitely skip the stealth gas attacks from the sleeping man wedged next to me on the 9-hour flight from Amsterdam to Nairobi.

Aaaaaah. The anticipation. That's Nairobi National Park out the window

Aaaaaah. The anticipation. That’s Nairobi National Park out the window

Because, guess what? We’re in Africa. And it’s pretty darned terrific.

The Dude. Who has not died, but gone to Heaven.

The Dude. Who has not died, but has gone to Heaven.

Yes, even though we’ve been in Africa just one day (not counting the virtual day spent waiting — and waiting — in line at Immigration last night). Yes, even though we’ve been here just one day, we’ve already seen 65 species of birds we’d never seen before, plus hippos, monkeys, impala, and so forth and so on. Which we’d seen before, but only in zoos. (Except they don’t call them ‘zoos’ anymore. They’re ‘wildlife conservation parks’.) But these were just running around, loose. We saw so many giraffe, in fact, that we were starting to go ‘What’s that? Oh, just another giraffe’.

Terry, our guide, astounded at how much The Dude already knows

Terry, our guide, astounded at how much The Dude already knows

Oh, and we saw a bunch of baboons. They looked so cute, with their babies riding on their backs and all. Though, when we took a break from cooing, Terry, our guide, who has lived in Kenya for about 40 years (on purpose) said ‘They look really cute, but if you have food, they’ll come and take it from you.’ ‘What happens if you don’t give it to them?’, we asked. ‘They bite you.’ ‘Oh.’

He then proceded to tell a story about a woman on one of his trips who took her socks off because her feet got hot or the socks got wet or whatever, and put them in a paper sack. She rolled the top of the sack down, and he supposed this baboon thought she was carrying her lunch in there, because that baboon wanted it. And got it. Must have been pretty disappointed when he opened it. But, not being familiar with baboons’ tastes, maybe not. Maybe now all the baboons want is your socks. Just don’t carry them in paper sacks.

Why did the baboons cross the road? To get to the sack of socks

Why did the baboons cross the road? To get to the sack of socks

I have to wrap this up quickly. We’re leaving the last place with (very slow) internet today. To travel to Tanzania, where we’ve been told that not only will we not have internet, we won’t have soap. That’s okay. I’m kind of looking forward to sidling up to Gas Man in the customs line on the way home.

Nairobi, Kenya. January 2016

11 thoughts on “Safari, so good.

  1. josypheen

    Have an amaaaazing time!

    I love that you are already so blasé about giraffes. I think they were my favourite animal when we went on safari! <3

    • Apologies for the late reply! We’re in Uganda, where we found not only more giraffes, but internet! So glad you love giraffes, and that you took the time to comment xoxo

  2. Ara

    Sounds like loads of fun!!! You and the dude must be tired, who would think just getting somewhere might actually take 1 day! Yikes!! I would imagine the route was worth it, all the transfers and different people you get to see. On a side note the baboon story (lol) I guess that woman changed there perspective on what to look for when looking for food. I sure hope they didn’t eat it. Well anywho enjoy your trip. Make memories and I can’t wait for the next post.

  3. Thanks for checking in so soon, Alice. I hope all that you went through to get there will be surpassed by the sights you see. A post on FB went viral – a passenger on a flight gave a note to the attendant regarding the excessive gas passed by a fellow passenger. The suffering writer wrote that the attendant might want to advise the gassy one to see a doctor in case he had “ass cancer”. Did you write that note?

    • Nope, I’m not the author of that FB post. But can sympathize. And yes, Africa is living up to all our expectations. Including the spotty internet. But that is so not a deal-breaker (!) Thanks for reading — will check back in as soon as I can!

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